new Vista style black header
31-01-2009 OOooh, survived another month !


and above a new nr 1 in my homo music top 100 becoz of the NYC movie première of Between love and Goodbye today

More poetry to end the month from Shortbus hero Scott Matthew (review)

'coz we all get it in the end . . .' comment?
30-01-2009 luv to hear an Englishman (or the NYC mayor) cry down the Dutch:


It sounds much less convincing if it comes from a Dutch mouth; besides, nobody would say it here: we're all afraid of being called intolerant and we're even more afraid that people might think we're actually fans or voters for Wilders. At least copying it here does show we are world champions when it comes to self critique: Oranje boven!
I'd say we need to be stay on guard for extreme voices from Islam, Christian Churches, Judaism, the mayor of Amsterdam and most of all for those "normal gays"! comment?
29-01-2009 Ramsey Nasr = Dichter des Vaderlands, (new poet of the nation)

Not often I have been so exhilirated by an election as just a few minits ago, not even when one of the greatest queer heroes of my generation: Komrij, got elected for this post, 9 years ago. As soon as possible I´ll reprint the poem he recited just now on tv, about the 'state of our nation' as there's not much I agree on more then that poem:

Ik wou dat ik twee burgers was, dan kon ik samenleven
en dit is mijn gedicht, komt u binnen.
let niet op de galm, wees niet bang,
Laat ons beginnen in leegte, welkom in mijn krater van licht:

ooit kwamen wij samen, u en ik, weet u nog ?
koel leefden we op in de glans van een roemer,
onze schaduwen als helder kristal.
onze roem even terloops
als de lichtval op de brief van ´n windstille vrouw.
goudbestoft waren wij, bleek, bijna doorschijnend van liefde waren wij,
wij loken de ogen voor de ander en we hielden van boete doen
vroeg iemend hoe het met ons ging dan zeiden we naar waarheid:
we schamen ons kapot meneer, wij waren er heilig van overtuigd
dat weooit onze bloedeigen heer zelf met gesels ineen geslagen
en op eigen houtje gekruisigd hadden.
de apocalyps stond bij voorbaat al straf op ons netvlies gebrand.
en wat is er gebeurd in die paar eeuwen
dat we even de andere kant op keken?

Ik wilde u graag een vaderland tonen, (homeland)
vormvast, zuiver
en met volgehouden metaforen een gedicht kneden over ons
maar toen ik begon moest ik toezien
hoe hier het ene volk het andere spontaan begon te vagen
als twee onverenigbare republieken.
hoe kwamen wij zo snel van nietig tot lomp?
van weerschijn tot alom aanwezige schreeuwhomp?
hoe kon uit zuinige rupsen dit Hummervolk opstaan?
Ze zeggen omdat god verdween:
onze vader had besloten nog wat onzichtbaarder te worden dan hij al was
kijken of dat kon, nee dat kon niet. weg was god.
en in dit stilleven met grote afwezige,
stonden nu de verbijsterde Nederlanden,
hun monden nog vol van vergankelijkheid,
vol wuftheid en alom gewaardeerd doodsverlangen.
al hun eidelheid was eidelheid gebleken.
Al hun schijn, hun gekoesterde slijk,
heel dit spiegelpaleis dat men ooit voor oneindigheid hield
werd nu voorgoed onbewoonbaar verklaard.
Je hoorde de rijp op hun zielen kraken.
en uit dat gat daar werden wij geboren.
Kevin, Ramsey, Doenja, Dachma, Roman en Cherity.
Als bij toverslag kwamen wij tevoorschijn,
bungee jumpend met oranje opblaashamers
gillend en kreisend en anti depressief
of zwijgend voor een breezer gegangbangd.
Welkom in Nederland vakantieland.

Ja, dat krijg je er van.
dit volk houdt men over wanneer je de schuld uit ons lijf ramt
we vullen de holte met glimmende leegte
tussen psalmenzangers en pillenslikkers
tussen het goud en het blingbling vond ik een land dat werd opgeheven.
Dit land is de wraak van de voorvaderen.
Als een beeldenstorm razen zij in ons voort.
Maar het bestaat,
zoals ook het verband tussen boerka en kinderstring bestaat;
tussen karnemelk en comazuipen.
hol en bol schuiven wij onze eeuwen ineen:
elkaar opheffen is onze kracht.
wij streven van nature naar leegte, zoals een cycloop naar diepte snakt.
Ziet u, een vaderland wilde ik u tonen,
niet deze woestijn van oneindige vrijheid,
maar hier wonen wij.
En hoe mooi zou het zijn, als iemand ooit, als een tweedehands godheid,
rijm voor rijm, een land zou bouwen voor dit volk, dat z'n volk mist.
Hier in de open kuil van van onze ziel.
Juist hier, zou iets groots kunnen worden verricht.
laat ons beginnen met een gedicht.

I would also like to do it justice in a translation,
but MY GOD, that will take me . . .

I heard a Belgian politician say today:
"we're best trained in using many words to say nothing".
Let's hope 2009 will make us all more aware and on guard for this. comment?

29-01-2009 another one I missed till today:

I just saw Kinsey, that I'd never seen till today, I'm ashamed to admit. It was on RTL8, so probably an n'th repeat. I thought is was just as profound and moving as Milk, I saw last week: "Everybody's sin is nobody's sin and everybody's crime is no crime at all", What a revolution that was in the ignorant and hyper regilious USA of late forties, and how daring it must have been to publish it then! I never knew it also showed his intimate and personal 'study' of homosexuality, so it's another one that requires inclusion in my alltime movie list. I never knew he resisted J. Edgar Hoover who tried to force him to surrendered his data so he could fire or prosecute all homosexuals in public office. After his collapse at a congress hearing, set up by 'religious bigots' to stop his work and stop financial support by the Rockefeller foundation: "Doctors say my heart sound like a cement mixer", his friend assistant says: "Well, at least THEY FOUND ONE !" and his remark: "I won't beg" when his attempts to re finance his project flaunders, again reminds me of my current argument and the shameful weakness at our local DWH.
We do have a small film festival in Delft from feb 26th at Lumen that was creatively called Gayvenement , but at least shows Fuckin differently by Cazzo hero Jörg Andreas, Dorian Gray ('06 version), Milk and Pink Narcissus, nr.2 on the all time list.comment?
29-01-2009 OOooh, what's happnin?


I crawled up through a hole in the carpet to a place where there was great joy, gorgeous aroma and food and everyone was HAPPY like me? comment?
28-01-2009 Mike Kirwan, who I'll hope to meet again at the ToF artfair end of march.

he called him Russell, but I prefer him as Neil from Young Ones:
Oh no, what's happnin? I climbed on the back of a giant anchovis, and crawled up through a hole in the carpet to a place where there was great joy and the dew on the grass krept up to my arse and everyone was like me: HAPPY! eh, exept me? comment?
27-01-2009 Let's quickly return to the good old days of motown, the year is 1962:

one of my early schoolday favorites: the band was called the countours
tell me baby do you like it like this, now tell me tell meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeee watch me now, hey,
push, hush, oh a little bit of soul now:
push, push, oh a little bit harder now: PUSH!
boom boom boom boom
boom boom boom DO YOU LOVE ME ?
so, now you get what this song is about ?comment?
26-01-2009 gay suicide awareness


here's another song that may be very American and very religion based, but sweet just the same:
the good old european song (from La cage aux Folles) with the same title:
sung by the best female voice in the world:
but also beautifully done by the american mother of gay pride:
Remember, suicide does not only happen amongst the young; there is also lots of lonelyness and lack of purpose amounst the older generation who don't connect with todays shortsighted COC's or other gay orgs like DWH.
Do also watch the clips I put online on jan. 24th the day Prayers for Bobby was first aired in the USA. comment?
25-01-2009 new work by James Bidgood:

Last year we were delighted to reconnect with the great cult pioneer and find him alive and kickin'. His movie 'Pink Narcissus' has remained in the top 3 of the all-time queer movie top 50 since it started. Out.com honours the birth of homo erotic photography with a NEW coverart work of the master!

Bidgood anno 2009 I do hope & pray it's a prelude teaser of a new release on his own merit with, if at all possible, a reincarnation or resurection of Bobby Kendall ?

first testshoot of Bobby Kendall, 1962 !!!! cover art of the Taschen book below (movie banner see right column):

Bobby Kendall, 1965
Masterclass members can watch his tribute pages at db/queerart comment?
24-01-2009 remember, tonight on Lifetime tv (not in EU, sadly):
at 9 pm ET/PT and January 27 at 9 pm:

mother coming to terms with the suicide of her son, she tried to cure of homosexuality with prayers
Sigourney Weaver in Prayers 4 Bobby.
and if you cannot see it maybe this song from 1968 will do:
The problem then, and still today is that so many of us really really did not want to be gay and when they are confronted with that inevitable fact, remain so overloaded with self rejection, fear and in many cases hate. What they desparately try to do in finding ways to cope is forgeing a lyfestyle that is closest to what they consider 'normal'. Closest to what they've learned from the 'hetrero' fairytales of their childhood. On average, we see that after 'coming out' it takes another 20 years before most of us realise that by doing so they are living another lie. It takes that long and many never get there, before they start to realise that and find their way around a lifestyle that they truly feel comfortable with. Before that their insecurities just trigger rejection and condemnation of any other gays that did not make their choices. Leaving us with a very sorry community that bickers all other queens, and comes up with wisecracks like:"they spoil it for all of us" or "look, you can be gay without being a sex obbsessed pervert". The hate ignorance and intolerance within our own culture is worse now then in the seventies, when we all had a common enemy; discrimination from the outside, school, law, church.

Don't say: that does not count for me, coz I was raised in a loving accepting environment, coz your family is just one early part of education, besides: that again only shoves the guilt into somebody elses backyard! You got to embrace your own culture, however much you want to scream out: "camp, travesty, promiscuity, that's not me". We all know, that deep down you know it is you: looking different at other guys then your hetro schoolmates. You will never get comfortable with yourself if you do think you can stay friends with your old hetro buddies, when they get married and have kids; you will never get comfortable with your own kind if you keep maintaining you prefer going out at the 'normal' bars, or if, like in Delft, there is a gay monopoly, within which you're confronted with an even more suffocating set of norms and values: a pathetic self confirming, strangling homo church that never outgrows puberty.comment?

23-01-2009 No bitching in the house of god ?

click for da music OK, yesterdays entry was enough; my mind and throat are cleared again,
for some time.
construction time again for love in itself, also for the last time for a while: de olieman is er vandoor . . .
true queer culture yet again delivered a USA, UK and NL nr 1 hit: comment?
22-01-2009 8 oscar nominations, and I saw it today:

I never know if I can trust policians, so I was not at all sure whether this film justified change in my movie top 50 of all time. But the way in which Milk introduces himself in his first campaign, he loses, at the beginning: "I'm a pervert, and I'm here to represent you", plus the gorgeous photography, very much in the analog photo camera's 'darkroom' technology of the era is mouthwatering for everybody who èver devellopped himself or filmed in super 8. Looks like it was made for my downstairs neighbour, if only he would not stand on 'de verkeerde kant', of a gay board that thinks market strategy can in politics èver be a justifiable excuse for intolerance towards your own kind. All this means the movie poses an even stronger case now then in Milk and Bryant's 1978

Milk, in my humble opinion, in a time where we need new vigilance in the gay community, with its optimism and'hope' is far more oscar deserving than the doom and gloom laden 'brokeback'. Well, at least he's got 3 best actor awards (last by screen actors guild) already in the pocket! comment?

21-01-2009 That was the Sunday, Monday, Inauguday

I got a reaction about the + & Proud video on Youtube like this:
"depressing or is it me? It seems like Amsterdam is stuck in a late Seventies timewarp. Old leather, old drag, old party themes"
well . . . deep breath, count to ten . . .
Sorry, but, I'd rather fuck with the old farts than with the twinks who did not want to be filmed, afraid of being associated with the group that organises the party. Just like A'dam groups that did not want to promote the event on their site for similar reasons. No wonder we've become allergic to twinky nerds and sectarianism and discrimination within our own, so called 'progessive' gay circles by guys who are just too young and ignorant to have heard that earlier line from a US president's inauguration speech, some 75 years ago: there is nothing to fear than fear itself !
As if I did not have my fair share of puke in Delft yet:


A good old 'echte mannen' night, oh how they will come to miss that in some years: Sorry, Delft nerds, and while I'm at it: in 2 years time these nitwits students who think they can shove the monogamous norms of their hetero mummies and daddies on all of us, will be long forgotten, while they try to convince our generation why we should pay them a salary: I'm sorry, I don't think so: They will go down in history as the nightmare years for tolerance and freedom of culture in Delft, they will for ever be associated with the George Bush era. Change you can believe in? How could we have been so blind to trust this generation? If they don't even respect their own kind: why should we trust that lot? I think I would even trust Obama (or Wouter Bos) sooner!
proceeding partly in Dutch, expressing true anger:
ook gecharmeerd van huppelkutjes? Liever een dom strak blondje dan rimpelbrains? Lees dan maar niet verder.
Iemand die mij eind 2008 nog denkt te kunnen overtuigen met de term 'marktmechanisme' ? zo iemand is niet is staat de dwh te leiden: met alle bankdirecteuren de laan uit! Hoezeer ik m'n meningsverschillen had met de vorige dwh voorzitter, ik heb nu al weer heimwee: wat je ook van hem kon zeggen, hij heeft nooit het oud liberale tolerantie-principe verraden. En potten, nog erger, nog verraderlijker: doe er nooit iets mee samen, daar kun je alleen spijt van krijgen: moedermoraal en schuldgevoel over mannen-jagers-identiteit: het blijven vrouwen! Daar zit de dwh echt op te wachten: dames: FUCK you! Een bedankje als een van de weinige content leverancier van het lustrumjaar kon er ook al niet af. Ach jullie doen die zelfbevlekking toch liever zelf. Ik doe het wel elders, en ga me bovendien ook nèver niet voor seksuele aktiviteiten schamen of me er voor verontschuldigen.
Heet dat geen koekje van eigen deeg? Ik heb me in 30 jaar nog nooit zo verraden gevoeld! Misschien wel het meest door de generatiegenoten, die beter horen te weten, maar voor 'de jeugd heeft de toekomst' of eerder 'strakke puberkontjes' gingen. Een goeje buur is meer dan een verre vriend? niks van gemerkt: misschien verhuis ik toch maar naar de US of A. Ach, als niemand maar denkt dat ik m'n sporen wil wissen of iets witwassen: ik heb me er al bij neer gelegd dat ik zo zwart als roet ben, voor dat soort strategie is het nu te laat. Nu is het: wie doet hier eigenlijk de geschiedschrijving? Imand met nul jaar of iemand met 30 jaar in depth experience? Iemand die nog moet leren schrijven of iemand die het toch nooit zal leren, like myself.
let's just celebrate with USA roots and (young?) reach out & unite strategy:
some of us do have dreams to remember
respect and / or satisfaction
and /or hold on: I'm cummin, maar niet op die lulletjes comment?
21-01-2009 The loooooohohoooooove boat . . .

Love, exciting and new
Come Aboard, We're expecting you.
Love, life's sweetest reward.
Let it flow, it floats back to you.
Love Boat soon will be making another run
The Love Boat promises something for everyone
Set a course for adventure, Your mind on a new romance.
Love won't hurt anymore It's an open smile on a friendly shore.
Yes LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE! It's LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE! (hey-ah!)
Love Boat soon will be making another run
The Love Boat promises something for everyone
Set a course for adventure, Your mind on a new romance.
Love won't hurt anymore It's an open smile on a friendly shore.
It's LOOOOOOOOOVE! It's LOOOOOOOOOOVE! It's LOOOOOOOOOOOVE !
Dorothy Glamour, Church Teadance Poz and Proud 18 januari 2009, click for video
Glorious fun, so CU at the next Poz & Proud Tea dance!
click for video life's for dancing!
of het met André Rieu is of met Sly:
comment?
20-01-2009 on the eve of the inauguration, let's look at the sorry state of their nation!
Sorry, but the words trust and change and faith look more empty with each passing day, even when he's not in office yet. His support for gay rights and equality has dwindled with each day his new status grew closer and needed more public credibility. He did, at the 11th hour, include an out gay bishop in the lead up to this inauguration, but it just looks like an excuse and empty gesture to me.
Why do you guys have to include all this clergy in a public ceremony anyway? Why don't you take the separation of church and state serious? Religion has been the biggest cause of wars, violence and destruction now for 4 millenia, where is the good in embracing that ?
the ass again, of the Gerard Reve variety
And no, it does not all come from a sick euroguy who despises your country, au contraire: I'm quite a fan on many of you guys and I do my bit to support your economy (see entry of 05-01): most below is quoted from nightcharm:
America’s last mass-produced export: Paranoia.
The discourse making the rounds in the wake of the wildly hypocritical Prop 8 passage comes down to homosexuality not having the cred to be a civil rights issue because it doesn’t hinge on skin color or other such physiognomy. Second class status is apparently the price tag attached to being a self-willed ethnicity. Heterosexuals have lives; gays have “lifestyles,” which I infer means owning luxury cars, eating quiche, and using “summer” as a verb.
So that makes it okay then ?
american gay landscape: self hate and suppression; hey guys, why not enjoy a gorgeous ass landscape?
Any member of the club will tell you that the real measure of our social mobility is our adeptness at navigating hetero circles without self-emblazoning the Scarlet G. Closeting is all about putting maximum effort into the artifice. Passing is a phenomenon not widely discussed yet oft-inadvertently experienced. It has allowed many of us access into sectors we couldn’t (or wouldn’t) normally breach. Watch as the wily queer instinctively employs his biological adaptation of Homoflage to mimic the herd and avoid detection. In a climate where you can still get sacked for being too light or too heavy in the loafers, a little edge that can allow you the jump on a heterosexual supremacist isn’t a bad ace to have up your sleeve. Don’t lie about the Gay — defy it.

Hey, Ted (Haggart), it’s called a hard-on. Either you get one or you don’t. Few things in life have this clear a litmus test. It’s not one’s own sexuality that’s complex and confusing but the willingness to name it frankly. It’s the barbed wire that megachurches have thrown around it, the religion-based shame about the human body itself — fragile and humble and temporary though it be — that makes such issues “difficult.” comment?
19-01-2009 That was the Sunday,

image: refreshmagazine.typepad.com 2008/10 refresh issue53
Me and my mate DeJa Corita were pretty pleased with the second Tea dance. Of course we're aware that the litmus test is not the first one, but the second and third. Sure, we were aware that we would not gather in the same numbers as on the première night, and that the euphoria could not last to thàt degree. Besides that, it is now january, depression, and a stormy rainy day, while we depend on visitors from all around the country, some travelling up to or over 2 hours.
Even so,
The number of visitors held up; the infant errors of the first night were taken care of. Thing went smooth all 4 hours. Just one reminder for next time: when we have already done a last dance routine, we do not need somebody local (we've never seen before) to come play their last own tunes, because they always do that. Especially if that is deducted from the time I need to take down the a.v. equipment. A highly professional unit has been put in 'free of charge' twice now, because the house system is insufficient. The fist time I had myself tricked into: "sorry no time to take it down anymore: come back next tuesday", well, this time I was on guard: if I am payed for a project like this there is a contract and a production supervisor who takes care that all that has been agreed acually is met. So next time, if I agree to do another time, if I do agree do do it free of charge, I do expect prefessional respect. It often goes like that: free, to many means: worthless and taken for granted. Even if the economy is on its knees, even if I have a reputation to go on my knees for any delight, I can't settle for that. So next time we do the last dance, last song and agree on bar closing time and work lights, nobody takes off another 30 minits of our precious time to take down equipment safely without prior consent. It´s not that I want to make myself more important than all other volunteers, but it ´s always the guys with the equipment, who are to first to come and the last to go, flue or not. Sorry, I had to make these remarks before I forget.
For the rest it was a perfect night. Sorry too, that I take the work I do so serious and I didn't allow myself to talk, dance and chat more. I did like my looks though: I wore white sailorpants that I had kept over 20 years, even though I was unable to tighten the zipper untill recently. Even now it was a close call, I did just manage with a tight belt and no underwear. Now let's see if we can't surpass attendance of the first night next time. comment?
16-01-2009 Bottoms of the world unite!
‘We’re bottoms, and we’re proud of it thank-you-very-much!’, writes Trevor Hoppe, one of the 3 instigators of the Bottom Monologues, a playwright project about bottoms. It will be based on stories that can be submitted untill the end of march 2009. The company of Trevor Hoppe, Erik Libey and Alex Garner got together at a conference in Seattle and decided to do a piece about bottoms. They felt the stigma on "taking it up the butt" could be changed with it. "In the queer community, identifying as a bottom comes loaded with a heaping serving of stigma. How many boys do we know who desperately try to convince others that they are, in fact, a top and not a bottom. This need to present socially as top is all about that stigma. The Bottom Monologues is about destroying that stigma, about queer men proudly proclaiming their decidedly threatening desires."
Now I'm not too sure about that: being a bottom is just as much a stigma as being a fan of drowning your nose. tongue, cock into that smelly, disgusting hole, let alone depositing that even more horrible poisonous, venomous substance in there, or playing around with it . . .
In short: anyone who does something more cretive with his or other's asshole then waste disposal is doomed.

And there are no greater and fiercer opponents of the practice then the perverts themselves, at least a multitude of them think that keeping silent about it, denying they do it, is the 'politically correct way to attract new 'victims' into their pervy community. Well, I hope you all see: giving off on people who are the core and essential to a community, and to denounce the very core of homosexual existance is what we are most likely to drown in these days.

I so hope this project will not duck the main issues at stake. Then it could surely become the landmark play we crave since Rimbaud, Wilde. Reve.

And on feelgood movies: I saw "Harry Potter and the chamber secrets" of which I drew this lesson: Maintain a certain disregard for the rules, stick to principles you know are right, regardles af the fear that leads others around you astray. I also saw Brokeback on tv again and now know why I am so appalled by the inherend doom and gloom: if you live fearing you're not allowed to live the life you want, you will never reach what you want. Maybe now I'll hate it a bit less, but it still will not be in my top 40.comment?

15-01-2009 Winterkost

Temperatures are above freezing again, so to keep you in the spirit:

Hema's high proteine winter grub!
Lower on fat, but much better in girth and protein then the HEMA variety ! comment?
14-01-2009 Huddy Bolly

John Lennon, like me, big fan of the Butt (eh, dd) boy of my youth:


you'd rather see the original spectacled heartthrob ? comment?
13-01-2009 When religion obsessed morons are allowed to insult us homos and non believers, then we're equally allowed to insult back on London Transport!

there is a video by the Guardian behind this image
That's what they found out in London, Manchester, Edinburgh, Glasgow, York, Cardiff, Devon, Leeds, Bristol and Aberdeen, Barcelona and possibly Rome: From yesterday's launch, buses will run with the banner above, because the campaign was originally started as a positive counter-response to the Jesus Said ads running on London buses in June 2008. These ads displayed the URL of a website which stated that non-Christians "will be condemned to everlasting separation from God and then you spend all eternity in torment in hell" The counteraction got an unexpected positive media reception; obviously many people are sick of religion being shoved down their throat (I know what I prefer down there, wait to see that here in two days), so instead of just 30 busses these cities will now have over 800 busses delivering the no-to-religion response.

Charles Darwin
and you creationist better be warned too, before you polute the environment with insane ads as well, because, whether you like it or not:
2009 is Darwin year! And may I also remind you: the earth is round and revolves around the sun. Does is surprise any of you most homos consider religion, all over the world our biggest ennemy? comment?
12-01-2009 SHIT, or the Society to preserve Humanity and Intelligence on Television

voted for the Dutch tv moment of the year:
And no, I will not show the winner here, because it comes from a gay tv show that is only for heterosexuals, and the presenter is 'happily' married with two adopted kids (from the USA! does your god allow that guys?) ,
but runner up 4, which gives much better advise on how to handle kids:

I also have my tv moment of 2009 already: our 'keuringsdienst van waarden' (consumer product watch) showed how tinned mandarin parts are separated from the white bits: with sewage-dissolver and hydrochoric acid. In China this happens manually, in Spain with machines, both are hilareous, but real ! Warning: do not watch if you are food sensitive or environmentalist or shop at Albert Heijn.comment?
11-01-2009 Ice insanity continues !
First I must say, I'm eternally grateful that I inherited such super professional skates, over 20 years ago of Leen Meiboom. One of the first aids victims in Delft. His partner, then house-mate Jan Breukelaar said I should have 'm, as it was unlikely that he would ever be scating again,

scating around Dobbeplas and Delftse Hout lake
and indeed, he died a few years later. I had them sharpened as I went all over the place earlier this week, but today I did over 25 km, and could easily keep up with all those super sporty macho teens.

fijne winter trui !
the busiest day on the Ice today as this weekend, the masses go touring our countryside on skates for the first time èver. This weekend makes clear why indeed this is our most incredible national event and why you cannot experience our true national identity, even for an anti-sport-queer like me, until you've met your neighbours at a "koek en zopie" stand

van Nootdorp terug naar A13
somewhere in the 'polder'. A bit dangerous too, as children, who've never been on natural ice before, do not realise that long distance skaters have speeds that are the same as cars, and are crossing canals without looking around, like they would, crossing streets.

yep, a bit of klunen (walking on skates, across dikes or low bridges) stil was needed here and there
a nice bit (in dutch) from another queer skater from Fryslân ?

scating through our gorgeous countyside
and some aerial views to convey the scale of this national passtime
comment?
11-01-2009 lazy fag recipe:

just take a glas (or cup) of Albert Heyn standard red or poor it from the C1000 Santo 3 liter pack, drop a few cloves in it, if you have it, a slice of orange would add to the 'style', place it in the magnetron for 10 secs, add a sprinkle of cinnamon, and Cheers! comment?
10-01-2009 morbid? updated anyway !

Rick Chris Funeral; links to old funeral page
As youtube or others take clips offline when record or filmcompanies complain, regular updates are needed. Did one for the old Funeral Top15 comment?
09-02-2009 Good Morning 2

Bryan Hawn
Well, not soo good actually: have been offline for 48 hours now, through another disruption at that horrid Dutch access provider Ziggo. Uploaded yesterdays entry at Martin's, just so you know what happened. I use my ziggo entry for classic paintings to introduce you to art history (new work each month)



is it just me, or do others also melt away seeing a jockstrap loaded with natural aroma?

Connection problems seem solved today, so to catch up, some pix that, just as good morning 1 on jan 4th show an apatizing hint of cock / ballscomment?
07-01-2009 NL is ice insane again, hooray !

scating through our gorgeous countyside
Pea soup, hot chocolate, glühwein, saurkraut, Hema worst:
Temperatures went down to minus 20 °C for a few nights. The fist time over here this century ! So for the first time in some years I went scating. Not too far, just up and down to Pijnacker, the village where I grew up, about 12 km. Boy, do I feel alive!comment?
06-01-2009 just heard Jerney Kaagman on the radio
She once (mid seventies, I kid you not!) was singing in the same tv show as I was in with my gay theater group, Sonja Barend's good news show, live from Frascati, Nes Amsterdam. Later on she became collegue of my house mate Erwin, managing music-royalties and unions affairs. Recently she is most known as the expressionless face in the jury of the Dutch Idols

This is a re-surfaced 12 inch length video; do you remember the now antique Mellotron? gorgeous!comment?
05-01-2009 jot down in your calendar :

sex and dance, or not . . .
starts at 16:00comment?
05-01-2009 Just did my bit to support the USA economy :

if that's not an economy size Chevy, what is ? I hired an all American car for my trip to LA when I'll attend the Tom of Finland artfair, march 27 till 29.comment?
04-01-2009 The fight back in California is gaining momentum :

January 24th the movie based on this story, with Sigourney Weaver in the lead, will be aired on Lifetime in the USA. Do let everybody you know, especially mothers, watch; things may have gone differently in California if it would have been finished before november 4 '08.

Meanwhile the book is available at amazon (right column).
My mum is called Mary too, a devout catholic, but luckily raised in a somewhat more authority critical environment, which she succesfully, as you may have gathered by now on these pages, passed on.

This story makes almost anybody, except the pope and Antoine Bodar realise that anybody born gay can hardly grow up other then resenting or at least questioning and rejecting religion. I'n god's name: How can that be a good thing? If we can question the words of the bible on issues like eating pig meat, mixing clothes fibres, the oririn of species, then why can't we question our mission as humans to over populate and ultimately destroy the world? All around nature we see species utilise same sex intercourse, so who are they to dismiss it as unnatural? comment?

04-01-2009 good morning

This reminds me how I felt ( and wished I looked) after the partly failed recovery of the fantastic mannenwerk new years eve party.
If that condition lingers on with you guys till today, maybe you need an uplifting beatles song or one from the silly musical days! comment?
03-01-2009 got these 3 gems from 1978 as new year wish from DJ friend Coen
will be doing Poz & proud Tea dance with him again on sunday the 18th !

and angel voice friend Daniel, now living in Cape Cod, sent me his moving 'auld lang syne', resulting in another resolution: go to the beach more often, I have not been to Hook of Holland at all last year !

Hook dunes, best in the world!comment?
02-01-2009 part 2 of the resolutions:
Politically correct is out, and so is market strategy; because when that word is used as argument, it hardly ever really based on market research. Especially in queer culture: Creativity and rejuvenation never came from that snakepit! Anybody who comes up to me with the word strategy better think twice: On gay & age, civil rights and tolerance-issues there will not be merchandised!
The award for most hypocrit gay org jointly goes to DWH and COC Rozenstraat (who came up with selling that place to secure their salary, COC National and COC A'dam divide is a highly infectuous wormhole nobody èver understood anyway and was only used as decoy. Now they want to move the headquarters to Den Haag, coz that's where tthe money is, they think; but everybody who thinks it wise to lick up to authority and kick down your base community needs to have their heads checked).
The smokers also better keep their mouth shut: what is more dangerous? bare fucking or smoking? I know my statistics: the most dangerous thing I do is motor bike riding!
For a change I go with Jort Kelder or soulmate DJAM'L, and agree:
NO MORE!
We declare 2009 the year of civil disobedience!
We've taken all we can from these religious dictators!
We hunger for the spirit of 68, need a return to the days of Provo,
revolt of the students and artists, revolt of the perverts.

Jort Kelder
I know, it is hard to swallow, but as the year is new, better get these images over and done with: they show the devastating results for your taste in ties, haircut, striped jackets and glasses (obviously, it must damage your eyesight too) of being poisoned with the norms, values and standards our christian governement stands for:

NL today: ministers of Social Affairs, PM, Justice
whatever you do, don't try this at home, folks !

NL today: ministers of Foreign Affairs, Family values; most puke inducing, and would you believe: Health!
These guys strive to smother the entire life of NL citizens in rules, regulations and laws and soon, like the dwh board, we will all start to look like these horribly deformed scarecrows. comment?
01-01-2009 2009, better:
click 4 vid way to go guys; not a straight song, not a gay song, but a better song, to go with my resolutions. Almost as strong as No matter what !
And one of those resolutions: not to be compulsive about uploading new content here daily, but rather go for quality content. It will also help me not to do something just coz it's on the agenda, but because it really needs doing. One of the 1st direct results of the 3 days of contemplation I had with the boys of "mannenwerk" comment?

to december 08
Queer culture
without cock and balls ?
That's called CASTRATION ! why are so many 'gaiiiys'
doing that to themselves?

Adventures log

Ships that pass in the night
and speak each other in passing;
Only a signal shown;
a distant voice in the darkness
So on the ocean of life we pass
Only a look and a voice;
a touch
extacy
then darkness again
and a silence.
after:
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Tales of a Wayside Inn

politically correct is the most dangerous infection, first symptoms: blocking creativity, spontaneity vigilance and economic renewal and is spreading like wildfire these days in the ghhhuraey community as it's more contageous then any STD!

If that is the way the ghey community thinks it must counter intolerace it's as doomed as the jews before Cristalnacht

best darkrooms in NL:

*
* Boss den Haag
* GayPlay R'dam
* Cuckoos Nest
* Web
* Dirty Dicks
* Argos

Johannes Vermeer Delft artist; I work at the guild hall where science art and crafts first flourished. He was chairman of it until his death in 1675
more

Delft artist killed at gunpowder disaster just 200 mtr from my home in 1654
order

Willem Tetrode, Delft artist victim of iconoclasm 1566
order

Founding father of my country, assasinated in Delft in 1584 for being too religious tolerant
more

sexual and lifestyle intolerance goes on till this day in my hometown where you'd least expect it

Dutch nudes history
order

We are all in the gutter,
but some of us
are looking at the stars.
Oscar Wilde


! this = soundtrack !

They always say
time changes things,
but you actually have to
change them yourself.
Andy Warhol

There is just nothing
I do better
like better

fun
laughter
tears


mini samples of db/queerart
homo erotic webmuseum

small bio
(*Pragmatist * lazy
* Internet Junkie * Softie @ Heart * Opinionated
* Promiscuous * First-Born
* Coffee & Jenever Addict
* Don't Like Slow Drivers
* Positive Attitude
and HIV status )

my time:

queer movies
Jonathan Rhys Meyers
all time greatest list

that's cinema,
not the porn variety
4 those see 5* links below



queer dance autoplayer

queer music
all time greatest top 200
idem on youtube
youtube follow up list



personal greatest music

my funeral music
can only be a wishlist

classic music
if funerals aren't your thing

[ view/sign Guestbook ]
old guestbook,
fell into a state of
worthlesness,
due to too christian
profanity filter
how can we discuss sex
without using any verb?
old entries
remain here




archives:
jan-dec 2000
jan-jul 2001
aug-sep 2001
sep-dec 2001
jan-feb 2002
mrt-mei 2002
jun-jul 2002
jul-aug 2002
aug-oct 2002
oct-jan 2003
feb-jun 2003
jul-dec 2003
jan-jul 2004
aug-dec 2004
jan-jun 2005
jul-sep 2005
sep-dec 2005
jan-mrt 2006
apr-aug 2006
sep-dec 2006
jan-jun 2007
jul-aug 2007
sep-oct 2007
nov-dec 2007
januari 2008
februari 2008
march 2008
april 2008
may 2008
june 2008
july 2008
august 2008
sep 2008
october 2008
november 2008
december 2008


some linkiewinkies:

Wayne Besen
Daniel Cartier
MadPuppy in SA
gay lab
neighbors will hear
(opera lover too) milkboys
well designed and clever
queerclick
thoughts on death
wasdag legend delft
A'dam gay skins
groundbreaking pornmakers
even more groundbreaking
timandroma
nekkid sword daily dose
porn producer/writer
retired pornstar's log
central porn director
Francois Sagat
anarcocks, examplary heroes
jockohomo
jocko's videos
Naked came I
being that guy
a cause des garcons french
think pink radio
beautiful mag
just beautiful men
gus
sharrow
lesen sehen hören

breeding




























pig-prod
barebackcity
livewithit,
animated series +&proud NL blog
living+bydesign
pozIam our dreams
are NOT infected

be one city
gay mens healt crisis
soa-aids.nl
No Condoms in NYC
cum monkeys NYC
poz4poz
bigappleboy
hot but vegan
geekslut
street muscle 501
barebacktop
revolutionary porn producers
young slut
*****bikeguy 13
***** rawtop
*****mansexjournal
*****my poz self
*****bookovpleasure
*****leatherskinbiker
*****montreal
*****DC collegeboy spermhole
*****bare twink pozzed!
***en français
***hott jizz kid
proven and reliable
below here
are almost dead
or just not updated
sex continuum
sluts progress
cumguzzler

love gay sex, I do !
gay skin, hmm
dudetube, NYC dick
flip flop
brent, or Sean

Harry Bush Brushes






























db queer art
db .nl entry
adonis art London
ToF-foundation
LeslieLohman nyc
leather archives
mooiman groningen
gayeroticartlinks
BruceLaBruce
pencilman
Mike
slavamogutin
east village boys
AttilaRichardLuKaCs
brian kenny
exterface
on male art
afriboy
HvH
anti-heroes.net
Benoit Prevot
Patrick Fillion site
Patrick Fillion blog
Boytoons Magazine
Logan porncomics
axel
messy & tasty
drub
Vespa driven
Tom Jones
p239.com
dirty graphix
brimstone & fire
daarxide
male drawing
daarxide
guydrawing chaz
MartinofHolland
dezeen design
vanity gay
Glen Mitchell
art & thoughts
Troy hot stylish
Stephen Fry eloquent

attitudehotels
male photo & vid: nightcharm
this log previous month

Dutch logs


















Je zou denken, daar weten ze wat tolerantie is, but: mietjes Delft is
UNIEK: de enige homo club in Nederland waar niet alle homos welkom zijn:
de homogristenunie
A'dam though finaly craves 4 "change" :


Amsterdam sex and dance parties ~bi monthly